Father's Day Belated

Well it's obviously been a little busy around here lately because it's two weeks past Father's Day and I'm just getting around to this. It might only be a week come to think of it but I honestly no longer have a good sense of time or space I just take things day to day. However, I did want to talk a little about Dads if I could.

On Father's Day before the big bash at 3pm I played my monthly gig at a local restaurant with my guitarist, Bob. Shortly after I arrived, a large family came to celebrate the day together. They sat, all 12 of them, next to us in very close proximity. I was, as I always am, very conscious in this environment of remaining background music as much as possible so as not to disturb their meal. Yet, the more I sang the more they engaged. This was lovely and welcome as it is often difficult to play in a restaurant when people are not there to see you and they would rather talk than listen. When I returned from the only short break of the day Bob stated that the 80 year old patriarch of the family had come up to give compliments and make a request that we play "Misty." We happily obliged and he smiled warmly. As the time progressed, we saw families come and go but they stayed for the duration eating, smiling, listening, talking. At one point the patriarch walked to the end of the long table and picked-up his infant great granddaughter out of the high chair where she'd been smiling and charming the room. She raised her arms to be held and he bounced her slowly around the table and walked around the restaurant.



At that moment I thought of my own father and the similar joy that he derives from seeing my children smile, play, and meet new milestones. I saw my husband toiling over how to create the perfect Christmas or taking pictures of every moment so as not to forget a thing. I thought how similar we all are as people and families. Our backgrounds may be different but in that moment watching that 80 year old African American gentleman walk his baby great granddaughter around he was my father and grandfather. I knew him and he knew me even if we never spoke to eachother. There is a knowing in that kind of love that binds us all to one another.



I left the gig feeling fulfilled and went on to the Father's Day festivities to celebrate my amazing husband and dad. Upon arriving at my father and step-mother's house my kids were happy and playing in their second home. Dad was carrying the baby much as that gentleman had been at the restaurant. The baby hugs him and reaches for his Zayde as my father is really the baby's favorite person. Everytime the baby does this my dad says "Do you see this? Why does he love me so much?" He's amazed and so appreciative. He deserves the love.



My husband arrived shortly after me and stayed the majority of the day outside with the two older kids in the sweltering heat playing and keeping watch. Coming in only to find food and make sure I didn't need him. Even on Father's Day he is a partner - stronger and more patient than me - the definition of better half he teaches me the meaning of peace, calm, and the value of maintaining a sense of humor (a lesson I am frequently in need of learning).

The world is fractured in many ways with so many advancements creating a cultural lag that has most of us confused and often overwhelmed. We have so many more options than once upon a time when things were simple. Yet on Father's Day and frequently in my life, if I choose to pay attention there are those moments when life is simple when family is all that matters and we feel only love.

I told my Dad that he was too normal to be a funny blog post but I didn't want the Special Occasion to pass without the acknowlegement that - flaws and all - I have always known I was loved and that gift is worth all the money in the world. Thanks Dad, Keith, and all the Dads who show up and do the work even if they don't always get the big piece of chicken - or tofu.